Face Bigelow #87 - We like our socialist medicine

Transcript:
Title: We like our socialist medicine, (just don't call it that...)

Big: This healthcare reform is pure socialism. I don't want anything to do with it. We don't want the government to run our health care, we want medicare to stay the same!

Victor: Hey Big, I'm confused. What gave you the idea that medicare was not socialized medicine?

Face Bigelow #86 - Christmas Apology

Face Bigelow #85 - Market Analysis

This market is a mess and I basically got out of it back in early October after earlier sell offs in mid-September. Glad I'm out, but I can't believe all the rhetoric going around telling people to keep their money in this game. Maybe it's just me, but hasn't anyone looked at the times when the market has tanked badly, it usually takes about 2 or 3 years to hit bottom? At least that's what I see. Until it turns into a long term market again, I'm staying out.

Transcript:
Title: Market Analysis
Big: The stock market is a great long term investment even when it's going down...
Big: You have to look at it from a historical perspective and not day to day.
Big: Look at this stock's low price. You can't sell it now. How much lower do you think it can go?
Victor: Try Zero! Then Buffet walks away with the preferred stock and reissues the regular stock...

Face Bigelow #84 - Blame Game

Transcript.
Big: It's all Clinton's fault.
Big: He changed the lending rules which lead to this entire mess.
Victor: Didn't you hold the presidency and a majority part for six years after Clinton?
Big: That wasn't enough to change those failed policies. He ruined everything. Now just look at the mess he created. What are we going to do? The world is going to end!
Big: Quick. Throw all the money overboard before we sink...
Victor: First things first. Let's stop with the policies of fear. Second, put the money bags away.

Face Bigelow #83 - Bureau Of Bailout Needs A Bailout...

This is completely insane. Paulson Backs off asset plan; crisis deals at risk. I agree with trying to put the train back on the tracks, but standing in front of it while it's still moving might not be the best idea after all. Did we all get sold an $800 Billion bottle of snake oil? Do we want to buy some more?

Transcript:
Big: We gave all the bailout money to the banks.
Big: None of it is going to relieve mortgage debt like we said it would.
Big: The banks are now hording the cash or using it to buy their competitors.
Victor: Your plan was to fix a greed problem by giving the greedy people more money?
Big: We need another bailout plan to bailout the first bailout plan.
Victor: Maybe we should stop and do an audit. Let's start with your account...

Face Bigelow #82 - Asleep At The Wheel

This comic is entirely unfair. It does express my own frustration with the last 8 years, but it is still unfair. I know W has worked hard, it just doesn't seem like he's at all connected with the American people. We are in the middle of a huge melt down in the economy and I don't think he's spoken about it publicly more than once. It just seems like he's asleep at the wheel. It took forever to realize that Rumsfeld was the problem with Iraq and now Afghanistan is going down hill and it's just stay the course even if the course is headed for an iceberg. Very disappointing. I'll be the first one to support a sitting president no matter who it is and even though I wrote letters against going to war in Iraq I still supported the decision when it happened. When everyone was saying we should pull out I was in support of staying. It is our responsiblity to leave Iraq in a responsible manner. We've caused enough suffering and we don't need to make it worse. Enough rambling, this is a good expression of my frustation.

Transcript:
Big: Zzzzzzz...
Victor: George... George.... Time to wake up...
Big: Huh?... Huh?... Who's there?...
Victor: Barack is at the door. It's time to wake up. Your second term is almost over...
Big: Oh. Okay. What happened?
Victor: Not much. Karl and Dick have been running the place.
Big: That's good. How'd we do?
Victor: Karl pulled a Skilling and abandoned ship just before the biggest crash. Otherwise we've got the worst unemployment since your father left office. You'll probably have that great legacy you wanted...

Face Bigelow #81 - Mideast Peace Deal

This idea came from a Reuters article saying it didn't look like there would be a mideast peace deal this year. I'm surprised that anyone would be surprised? What an odd article.

Transcript:
Big: I'm so disappointed that we are not going to see a peace deal this year in the middle east...
Victor: Were you working on a peace deal?
Big: Not really, but I was still hoping to see my legacy include a peace agreement.
Victor: Don't you have to be engaged and working on a deal for one to happen?
Big: What a great idea. I wish I would have thought of that earlier...
Victor: !!??!!

Face Bigelow #80 - Bonus Check

This bailout money looks like it is well spent.... If you are on the hook to receive bonuses from the bailed out companies.

Bailed out banks ordered to reveal executive compensation.

I thought Wall street teaches us not to throw good money after bad, so why is it that the market is rallying when the government is the one throwing the money? Do we think that these investments can't go bad now that the feds (the regulators) are part of the institution? I'm really confused. To me it just looks like the federal government has now tied itself to the boat anchor these executives threw overboard.

Transcript.
Title: Bureau of Bailout
Big: Hey Victor. Here is your bonus check...
Victor: Bonus? I thought we almost went bankrupt last quarter?
Big: This is your bonus for getting that bailout money from the Bureau Of Bailout.
Big: Now we just have to figure out how to survive this quarter after we spent the money on bonuses. Will you ask BOB for our next installment? It could mean another bonus!

Face Bigelow #79 - Friendly reminder

Since it's was widely proven (in 2007) that Barrack Obama is not a muslim I find it hard to believe the number of e-mails I'm still getting that claim that he is. I think both candidates will do a good job and don't think it is in any of our interests to spread inflammatory lies. Don't believe everything you see on the Internet and help yourself avoid looking like a hate monger by using google and snopes.com to look up stuff that seems too unbelievable to be true.

Transcript
Title: Presidential Candidate
Big: Victor. Since you are running for president, I looked into your list of friends.
Big: It shows here that you have a friend who is a Muslim...? Could this be true...?
Big: Why yes. I've been good friends with a few Muslims for many years. My faith does not preclude friendships outside of my faith.
Big: We think that means YOU are a Muslim and unfit to run the country. Muslim! Muslim! Someone arrest him!!! He must be a traitor!!!

Face Bigelow #78 - R Word

It's time for some truth and a lot less of the avoiding blame game.
http://www.forbes.com/afxnewslimited/feeds/afx/2007/10/16/afx4225690.html

Transcript.
Title: Mr Treasury
Big: Housing numbers are bad. Really bad.
Big: The economy is at a point of "correction".
Victor: Doesn't negative growth mean "recession"?
Big: The current administration doesn't allow me to use that word so we are just seeing a "correction" for a few quarters.
Victor: Must be some new form of transparency in government...

Face Bigelow #77 - Bad Debt

I understand making sure regular banks have capital and insuring deposits, but when we bail out investment banks and Wall Street companies that have serious financial problems is that really wise? Even if it hurts us all isn't it better to teach these firms and all their analysts who said everything was AAA a lesson? What message are we sending when we give them 75 billion one week, they throw a big party and ask for another 30 billion a few weeks later? Are we just covering an interest payment and making the problem even worse? What a mess.

Transcript
Big: Victor, you are my closest friend. We are almost like family.
Big: I've maxed out all 75 of my credit cards and have gone underwater on the seven homes I own.
Big: Would you be willing to take over all of that bad debt so I can get back to the spending spree?
Victor: Sorry Big. I keep my finances balanced. You'll have to talk to the Bureau of Bailout. They'll take it over. They are already doing that with Wall Street.

Face Bigelow #76 - AIG vacation

Inspired by real world events where AIG is caught spending tax payer money on an extravagant retreat. That's what I typically do when I'm on the brink of bankruptcy, plan a five star vacation...

Transcript
Big: Hey Victor. They bail out check is here.
Big: We are headed to California to spend some quality time deciding how to spend all the money.
Big: We can just wait out the crisis in style! No worries.
Big: Open bar, $600 rooms, everyone gets a massage... Crisis? What Crisis?
Victor: With the $85 billion from the government you could do this all winter. Great prep for your jail term...

Face Bigelow #75 - Haliburton 2.0

Transcript:
Title: War On Terror 2.0
Donald: We are on the trail of the WMDs (Wreckingballs of Massive Debt). The trail has brought us to the doorstep of Haliburton.
Donald: I suggest we bring in heavy artillery and storm the building. Mr. President, do you concur?
Big: I think it would be in everyone's best interest if we stepped back and talked with them first.
Big: In fact, here is a ten billion dollar contract so Haliburton can investigate this problem for us. Please go back to pinning this problem on Osama.

There is a typo in the cartoon and it's a pain to fix so I'm going to leave it. Sorry not that many people read this anyway.

Face Bigelow #74 - War On Terror 2.0

The more I hear, the stranger it gets.... Or is it just me?

Transcript:
Big: My fellow Americans. I've hired my good friend Donald to seek out and destroy these economic terrorists that have caused this financial crisis.
Big: He will also find the WMDs (Wreckingballs of Massive Debt) and destroy them. Donald, please give the American people an update on the situation.
Donald: We understand the Osama Bin Laden was originally working at a training camp in Countrywide where he trained many cells of economic terrorists.
Donald: We have not yet located the WMDs, but we feel confident that they will turn up soon. As for Bin Laden, he has since crossed the border into Pakieystan and we will find him soon...

Yes, the spelling was on purpose to show odd pronunciation the people in this administration use. It would be a sad day, but it wouldn't surprise me to see Donald chosen for this type of job. He already got to oversee a trillion dollars in waste, why not give him another 800 billion...?

Face Bigelow #73 - Bureau Of Bailout 2.0

I was pondering what it would take to get this flawed bill through the government and the results of my thoughts were not very positive. At least that's what I think our law makers will do. Any way you look at it the results are not going to lead to a positive outcome, it's just that some outcomes are less negative than others. What a mess.

Transcript:
Title: Bureau Of Bailout 2.0
Big: The Bailout Bill failed because no one wanted to spend that much money.
Big: We are going to try again to create a Bailout Bill that everyone can agree to.
Victor: What are you going to change?
Big: The only thing we can change... We are going to make it even larger so everyone can get their own pet projects attached to it.
Big: It's now the $720 billion bailout plan.
Victor: I should have seen that coming...


Transcript

Face Bigelow #71 - Bureau Of Bailout - House Free

I know there are probably a lot of people who were taken advantage of during the mortgage boom, but there were also many people who took great advantage of the situation and are still doing so. This comic is targeted at the later. The ones who worked in collusion with Wall street to swindle us all.

Transcript
Title: Bureau Of Bailout
Scam Artist: Wow, this is great! I bought this place with no money down.
Scam Artist: I defaulted on the mortgage so I didn't have to pay anything for a year until they finally kicked me out.
Scam Artist: And now that BOB stepped in to save me I can afford to buy a second house on pure speculation! BOB even offered to pay off my credit card bills!
Big: Here's your check
Scam Artist: Gucci here I come!

Face Bigelow #70 - Bureau Of Bailout - Kalifornya

During this financial crisis California finally passed a $103 Billion California State Budget. It dawned on me that the amount they are requesting to bail out these financial firms is almost six times the budget of the worlds sixth largest economy! It's like trying to think of the distance from hear to the nearest neighbor galaxy. You just can't fathom the amount. This just can't be right...?

Transcript:
Title: Bureau Of Bailout
Big: Okay, Okay. The crisis was a big ruse to get my house in the Hamptons and make sure my Goldman shares didn't disappear.
Big: But now I have this extra $600 billion to deal with. What to do? What to do?
Big: Wow, look at that! California just signed a $103 billion dollar budget and they are having all sorts of financial problems...
Big: Victor! Get Schwartzie on the phone. I want to see if he'll sell Kalifornya for $600 billion?
Victor: Or maybe we'll just call it a bailout..?

Face Bigelow #69 - Bureau Of Bailout - Credit Card Debt

Transcript:
Title: Bureau Of Bailout
Debtor: This Gucci purse didn't last as long as I thought it would and now I have $35,000 in credit card debt.
Big: But the purse still looks new.
Debtor: It is, but it went out of style after two weeks.
Big: Oh, now I see. That does sound like fraud. Here is a $35,000 bailout check.
Debtor: Great. One more thing. Can you make it out for $35,404? I need a new iPhone and a Latte...
Big: My pleasure

Face Bigelow #68 - Bureau Of Bailout - Big Check

This is aimed at both Dick Fuld and Henry Paulson. I don't know much about Fuld, but I have liked Paulson so I don't really think he's bad I just don't like the whole bailout and I do think he has a big conflict of interest having probably lost a ton of equity in the dropping shares of Goldman.

Transcript:
Title: Bureau Of Bailout
Big: Next! Oh hey, my good friend Richard. How can I help you?
Richard: I lost the $700 million I made selling bad mortgage debt.
Big: You came to the right place and used the right buzz words. Mortgage and Debt. After buying a house in the hamptons and bailing out my own Goldman shares I have some money left over for you.
Big: Here's a check for $700 Million. Stop back again if you run into more trouble...
Richard: Wow, that was easy! I guess I can get that new yacht after all...

Face Bigelow #67 - BOB - Bureau Of Bailout

Uh oh, I can feel a landslide of comics coming down the pipe. Looks like the dam built up after the vacation has burst...

Transcript.
Title: Bureau Of Bailout
Big: Now that I have the $700 billion bailout fund, I think The Bureau of Bailout needs a new office.
Big: Hey kid. How much for the office building?
Kid: Well, I have an ARM (Adjustable Rate Mortgage) on it for $1.2 million that is set to adjust next month.
Big: Perfect. I can bail you out and get the office at the same time.
Kid: I'll take it and throw in a free lemonade for only $6.00.
Big: BOB is open for business, who's first?